February 8, 2018

Kasane [Chapter 109 - Expected Attitude]

Kingo says that there’s no problem with Iku. “The one with a problem is Saki. From the looks of it, you still haven’t totally gotten into the role.” This made Saki tense. Standing up, Kingo says forget it, rest first. “In a while, we’ll rehearse that scene again. Do you hear?”

Saki watches everyone discuss and practicing by themselves. Saki walks towards the table and drinks from a bottled water. Then, everyone is surprised when she slammed the bottle on the table. Saki angrily wipes the water from her lips.
Kingo thinks that for her to be like that, one cannot say that she is ‘Saki’, rather she is ‘Kasane’ herself. “Could it be that she wanted to use that kind of attitude as she go about her last stage play? Even if Nogiku said, ‘It is also possible that Kasane has some plan’, but...is it really like that?”

“Kasane... I’m afraid that she really wanted to walk away from the stage and be killed by Nogiku. Otherwise, it is impossible for her to hand over the lipstick... That ‘lipstick’ is... propping up that woman’s moral pillar to keep living in the fantasy world...”
“...If she lost the lipstick...Kasane doesn’t have anything at all. Unexpectedly destroying the ‘self’ that she longed for. What kind of joke is that! Kasane...your life and your talent must blossom below the white spotlight as Izana-san wished!

“...In order to accomplish this goal...no matter what method is used, I must make you accomplish the ‘permanent switch’. Make you be thoroughly reborn as ‘Saki’ though this ‘Ake no Hime’, become the new generation’s ‘legendary actress’...”

They started the rehearsal again. With a lantern, Ake goes to a small shack at the forest. Ake calls out, ‘Yoi... Yoi... It is I, Ake... I’ll listen to thy wish... So, please doth not bring disaster to the village...”
Crawling on the floor, Yoi sees Ake through the slightly open door. She calls out, “Ake...I gazeth on for so many years... a noble and pure white flower...” Ake is startled. Yoi glares at her. This made Ake shudder.

Yoi tells her, “I am like a worm in front of a flower like thee. Actually, I cannot alloweth thee to witness with thine own eyes my ugly state. If thee really wish to listen to my desire, then...giveth thy beauty to me...”

Tense Ake quickly slam the door open. Yoi let out a scream in surprise as she quickly retreats away. Trembling Ake says, “Don’t cometh over...do not look at me...”
Saki imagines Yoi’s figure as her ‘Kasane’ self. Narration: “Ugly witch ‘Yoi’— Groveling, ridiculous [/comical]. Due to her self-inferiority, she is curling back up to her waist. Won’t dare raise up her head--”

Lowering the lantern, Ake looks down and says,...you... *Kingo and Iku notice that Saki is pausing* if thou art conscious [/have apprehensions] about thy physical body, then repent and mend thy ways right now.” Reaches out her hand, Yoi asks, “Repent and mend my ways?”

Saki looks tense. She thinks that she didn’t think that just by relying on just one face switch... “Iku can understand an ugly person’s heart quite thoroughly like this...”
With a pleading expression, Yoi says, “I shouldst be the one declaring those words. I am already the incarnated forebears’ spirit (god) whom thee people has forgotten. My several hundred years of adversity, will hereto immediately be gone...[if I get your beauty]”

Narration: “Wrong, senpai has always been paying close attention to me whether it is during school days or right now. *looks tense at Iku’s Yoi* So, this is the ‘me (Kasane)’ in your eyes!!” Trembling Saki backs away. Kingo mutters that no matter how many times they’ve rehearsed, she’ll stop at this part.
Narration: “In this scene, Ake will hold up the mirror on her neck and illuminate it on Yoi to breakdown her sin, devalue her appearance-- *tense and breaths deeply* Get...mirror and illuminate it on her... But...I cannot do it... I don’t want to see it!!

...*Iku is puzzled since Saki isn’t continuing acting* If I illuminated the mirror on her, I’ll definitely see my own shameful ugly and crying pitiful self. If I see that kind of thing, I’ll definitely become abnormal! Furthermore, right now, ‘Saki’s current existence had become weak and fragile--”
Kingo claps his hand and shouts, stop. Saki immediately falls down on the floor. Walking towards her, Kingo says that it is impossible that she is forgetting her lines and forget about stage cues, right? “Saki, don’t you want to act on my play?” Saki says no, not at all...

He asks if she is saying that she is already at her limit in maintaining ‘Saki’s identity. Saki didn’t reply. A guy whispers to a woman that he always felt that way of talking is strange. The woman says that maybe it is an analogy.

Kingo says that her room for growth is by all means, not limited to this. “The unpleasant situation is just temporary. Right now, ‘Saki’s acting journey has just started!” Saki asks if he thinks that is what she wanted? This made Kingo scowl.
He shouts that is enough! “If you cannot concentrate in acting then, rest until you can concentrate! Not only me, your stagnation troubles everyone here!”

Later on, Saki is huddled to herself at the corner. She thinks that everyone had dropped her who is in a rut and they continue to move forward. *everyone else is busy acting* Truly pitiful...truly humiliating!!

...I originally thought that the beautiful proud stance will blossom once more and afterwards, fade away again-- But, even if ‘Kasane’ (I) am using ‘Saki’s face... I also cannot shed off my own ugliness... The me who is like this...”
Saki faces Kasane and says, “Always ‘I’, ‘I’, it’s annoying to death.” Looking straight at crazed Saki’s eyes, Kasane mutters, Saki... Towering over Kasane, Saki says, “Anyway, this life will sooner or later be given to Nogiko. ‘Kasane’ (you) are already useless...

...This time around, in order to let me totally become ‘Saki’ (me), in order to become ‘Ake no Hime’ (me), ‘Kasane’ (you) should go and die!! Die! *strangles Kasane* Die!”
As tears are falling, Saki is strangling herself with her own hands and muttering, die... Thud. This surprises Iku and the others. They see Saki lying on the floor. She is breathing hard.

Everyone worriedly calls out to her and asks if she is alright. While crying, Saki chuckles then start laughing. Kingo and Iku look worried. Narration: “This is the voice of a shattered vessel that was filled with desire.”
Comment: Iku is doing really great thanks to one face switch and observing Kasane before and now. It seems that she had reverse roles with Saki during Star Drop since Saki is having trouble with her role. Of course what Saki is going through is quite different from Iku’s.

In a way, this seems to be a variation of Macbeth. Kasane is no longer facing the ghosts. Here, she is having a hard time confronting her own self whom she really detested. It doesn’t help that Kingo is pressuring her. I cannot blame him either since his dream is already so near but things aren’t going smoothly like before.

I think he knows that something is wrong but he just assumes that it is because of some superficial reason like she is forced to do something she doesn’t want to do. Or perhaps, he also doesn’t know how to help her and just hopes that doing that will somehow make her pull herself together.

Well, if this keeps up, Kasane is really on her way for a meltdown. And, it might be fatal since the Saki in her mind almost got her killed. Seeing their lead like that, everyone ought to be rattled about the future of this play. Scans by 网易汉化

Quote of the day:
Fear is only as deep as the mind allows. ~ Japanese Proverb